Posted On: June 7, 2006, 2:49 pm CDT

Posted By: El Squid

In my collection of automobile magazines I have some very old issues that warn us of some motoring hazzards we never consider today.

In my oldest magazine there is an article quoting some clergymen who believe that if people ever spend a lot of time travelling at over a mile a minute, their souls will be torn from their bodies.

Another issue from the WWI era says that if wireless sets (radios) ever become common in automobiles that our roads will be flooded with the blood of distracted drivers who had been listening to tunes in their cars.

Since I seldom drive below a mile a minute, and I listen to tunes in my car, and I use my cell phone from time to time when I drive, I must have died in a fiery crash some time ago.

Alternatively, because I pay attention to my driving and I move into the slow lane if I'm going to use my phone and because I don't grill hot dogs or paint portraits while I'm driving I am not very likely to crash my car or hit anything.